Male Masterbation Techniques Explained

Learn the top 10 male masterbation techniques. Read below!
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Yonder comes the blues
February
22
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male masterbationGoing to college? Your first time away from home can be a time of great loneliness and isolation. You know no one, you are not used to the system, everything is strange and new. If your parents didn’t sling you into a boarding school as a kid, the shock of suddenly being alone can hit you doubly hard. Not only that, your girlfriend is now the best part of 1000 miles away, and unless you manage to score within the first week or two, you’re going to be going without blowjobs. Unthinkable. But it’s at times like this you have to think the unthinkable.

You have to get yourself an Autoblow Blast. The Autoblow Blast is the world’s first fully automatic deep throat blowjob machine, and once it’s riding up and down your cock, it has an extraordinary ability to make things feel comforting, soothing and very pleasurable, no matter what your situation. What’s more, without an Autoblow Blast, you’re going to get sorely tempted to put it about on campus, and the next thing you know, you’re tied down with a brainiac babe at college and another babe at home; complications just when you don’t need things to be any more complicated.

Kids left home? At the other end of the scale, maybe you’re finding the house strangely empty now that the kids have flown the coop. Your wife’s into committees and always got her head buried in minutes of meetings. Your dinner’s sitting next to the microwave when you get home. Hell, you even know what day it is by what dinner it is.

We know what you’re thinking. There has to be more to life than this – and there is. Now you don’t have to have the full fat mid life crisis and buy a Honda Goldwing and motorcycle to India, but if you do, be sure to put the Autoblow Blast in your pannier. There’s many a stop-over between Delaware and Delhi, and while it might be cool and unusual to get to know a variety of lovers along the way – it all leads back to those little complications that you just don’t need.

So whether you’re locking yourself away in your college dorm, in your study or by the fire, listening to the coyotes howl in Western Nebraska, here’s something really uncomplicated. Visit www.roboticblowjob.com today and blow away your blues.

 
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Truth, freedom and the American Way
February
10
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Male MasterbationThe McCarthy era was not a good time for aficionados of the Autoblow Blast blowjob machine. The good Senator had decided that receiving a fully automatic blowjob from the Autoblow was ‘Un American’, especially as the machine itself was imported directly from the motherland of Communism itself, Red China.

It was widely believed that otherwise red blooded Americans were receiving secret Commie coded messages while they were in a state of euphoria afforded by the sensational deep throat blowjob simulation of the Autoblow.

It had to be stopped. And the only way to make it stop was to lean heavily on those that were known to be indulging themselves with its irresistible charms.

First port of call was the fast and louche lifestyles of the Hollywood creative industries; the moviemakers, the movie producers, directors, scriptwriters and actors that were no doubt finding ‘creative fulfilment’ in the loving embrace of the Autoblow Blast.

Those that confessed following aggressive questioning and rigorous house searches, were ‘encouraged’ to name names of others receiving a first class Commie education from its sweetly massaging silver beads. Soon all of Hollywood was suspected of harbouring, coveting or outright abusing an Autoblow Blast.

Men who had hardly been kissed in their entire lives, much less got lucky with an Autoblow, suddenly found themselves vilified in the press as degenerate red sex slaves.

But, cometh the hour, cometh the man; in this case, quite literally. One brave man made a stand, and this he did in the middle of a congressional hearing on un-American activities. Whipping out his all American whopper, he slid into the smooth silicone sleeve of the Autoblow Blast.  Before a full panel of shocked, bespectacled onlookers, he revved the multi-speed controller up to full blast and came fast and copiously.

When he was quite finished he held the Autoblow aloft and declared loudly and proudly to all assembled: ‘God Bless America!’

It was a Eureka moment. Suddenly it became crystal clear, if a man could experience the full power of the Autoblow Blast and still remain unswervingly loyal to America, then fears of Communist coded messages in the machine were completely unfounded. At a stroke, the Autoblow witch hunt was blown away.

Of course today you can avail yourself of the Autoblow Blast’s incredible thrills without fear of the knock at the door at 2am by over anxious G-Men.  Visit www.roboticblowjob.com now and strike another blow for truth, freedom and the American Way.

 
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Lesser known love sleeves
February
10
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Male MasterbationWell, they can’t all be famous! For every Fleshlight, Tenga or Autoblow Blast, there’s a dozen lesser known love sleeves of all types, shapes, materials and designs. All the top sex toy manufacturers design and market a wide variety of them, so inevitably some of these sleeves become better known than others. But that’s not to say you can’t find a low cost, lesser known male masturbator to put a big shit-eating grin on your face! Here are half a dozen cock caressing examples.

Sexy Lil’ Slut Silicone Masturbator

Made by Pipedreams, this super stretchy hygienic silicone masturbator comes with a sexy little slut etched into the design, hence the name.

Ultra Soft Vagina

This soft, tight jelly vagina toy comes with a multi speed vibrator from a removable bullet. Grips beautifully and is always ready for you to go again and again.

Extreme Toyz Tight Young Snatch

You’ll love the soft flesh-like feel of this tight pussy as much as the name itself. It’s open ended for easier cleaning too.

Jodie Moore’s Mouth Masturbator

Life-like masturbator sleeve that many guys claim feels better than a real mouth! It’s warm, tight and velvety-soft, and cast from porn star Jodie Moore’s own sensuous mouth.

Pearl Power Piston

Made by California Exotic, this clear, soft and tight jelly masturbator sleeve will cling to your cock and thrill you with its array of deliciously bumpy pleasure beads.

Lacey Double Trouble Masturbator

Lacey Double Trouble Masturbator is another great low cost sex toy by California Exotic. It gives you the dual joy of a plunging between a wonderful pair of well stacked boobs caressed with hands, into a soft inviting mouth. Lacey Double Trouble is made from SoftTouch material that provides you with comfort, stretch and superb sensations.

Road Warrior Whacker

Here comes instant gratification no matter what the situation! An easy to carry soft textured love sleeve from California Exotic.

 
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5 things you may not know about masturbation, (but could hazard a guess) part 2
February
5
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This is part two of our research into things you may not know about masturbation, but actually probably do. For part 1, scroll down.

4. Certain forms of masturbation can lead to sexual dysfunction.

Experts warn us that men who frequently stimulate themselves in ways that don’t simulate sex with a partner, i.e. spanking the monkey, can develop retarded ejaculation. That’s not to say your cock requires counselling and special needs, (although special needs sounds kind of interesting in this context)  it’s a type of sexual dysfunction in which it is difficult or even impossible to climax during partnered sex.

“Any man experiencing any sexual dysfunction should ask himself if he’s masturbating in ways that produce sensations that differ from those he gets from his partner’s hand, mouth, or vagina,” says Michael A. Perelman, PhD, clinical associate professor of psychiatry, reproductive medicine, and urology at Weill Cornell Medical College in New York City and the president of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research. “Then he should consider what he could say to her to make the stimulation more similar — and how he could change the way he masturbates to make it feel more similar to what his partner does.”

That’s deep, but here’s an idea; get your girlfriend to toss you off. The feeling will be pretty much the same, then gradually wean yourself off her jerking you off and get into some real sex action instead. Problem solved.

5. Masturbation may affect the risk for prostate cancer.

The relationship between masturbation and prostate cancer is a bit hazy. When ‘experts’ say ‘hazy’ it really means they haven’t a clue.

A 2003 Australian study published in BJU International linked frequent ejaculation early in life with reduced risk for prostate cancer later on. But in a 2004 study published in The Journal of the American Medical Association, a researcher reported that “ejaculation frequency is not related to increased risk of prostate cancer.” In both these studies, ejaculation frequency included sexual intercourse and masturbation.

But then again, just this  January in BJU International, researchers found that frequent masturbation in young men raised the risk for prostate cancer but that frequent masturbation in older men lowered the risk. In men over age 50, the researchers theorize, frequent masturbation helps drain the prostate of fluids that may contain cancer-causing substances. So what the experts are telling us, and which you would never have figured out for yourself, is that you can be a randy old goat until you are way past 50.

 
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5 things you may not know about masturbation, (but could hazard a guess) part 1
February
5
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Just about every man who can masturbate does, and because there is so much information out there about it nowadays, it’s not a question of what can you find out about male masterbation, it’s what you don’t know about the ancient art of cranking the handle that counts.

1. There’s no such thing as “abnormal” masturbation.

“Every man masturbates in his own way”, says Martha Cornog, the author of The Big Book of Masturbation, “whether he uses his hands, rubs against something, uses a sex toy or household object, wears special clothing, fantasizes, looks at a book or magazine, tries different positions, or looks in a mirror.” Hang on a minute, I thought you were going to tell me something I don’t know about masturbation. Do you mean to tell me an ‘expert’ wrote a big book on masturbation and this is her main finding? Ok, try this.

2. Masturbation is very safe, but not entirely safe.

Masturbation will not give you a sexually transmitted disease. You knew that, and unless you are trying some pretty advanced techniques it also won’t give you muscle strains, pokes in the eye, and deep personal embarrassment that you came too quickly. But did you know that masturbation safety isn’t guaranteed?

Says Martha Cornog: “The laws of physics and biology don’t stop operating just because someone is masturbating. Habitually masturbating face down, by thrusting against a sheet, pillow, or even a carpeted floor can injure the urethra in such a way that urine exits the penis not in a stream but in a hard-to-control spray.”

It can get so bad that that Barbara Bartlik, MD, a psychiatrist and sex therapist in New York City, says she has seen facedown masturbators with urethral trauma so severe that they are no longer able to use a urinal and must urinate while seated. Oops, that can’t be good. That means you’ve got to queue for the john when you’re out in the mall. You’ll take longer than your girlfriend!

And in extremely rare cases, masturbation or sex with a partner can cause a penile fracture. This painful condition is when an erect penis strikes a hard object or is forced downward. A medical emergency, it often necessitates surgery. Now come on, you didn’t know that they could put your cock in a splint, did you. Ok, next.

3. Masturbation can turbo-charge your relationship

Bashing the old bishop can help teach men about their own sexual turn-ons, — what feels good to them and what doesn’t and this can be communicated to ther partner. It also helps teach men to avoid the nightmare of premature ejaculation. Perhaps most significant, it’s a coping mechanism for any man whose partner is temporarily unavailable for sex. Hmm, how much did they pay these experts to tell us that jerking off is great consolation for when you haven’t got a girlfriend to bend over and bang? Where do I apply?

 
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